God sure took me seriously when I said that I needed today to be a recovery day. And He has blessed it, although not in ways that I would have anticipated (I know, no surprise there, right?).
First of all, this sunshine! I am so, so, so thankful for it. I don't think I have seasonal depression or anything like that, but winter in upstate NY can be rough on this girl who grew up in the tropics.
Secondly, I had intended to stay in bed with Brennan all day (other than for necessities, like changing diapers, drinking water, eating lunch and so forth). Then a new friend from church reminded me that we were supposed to go walking with our boys on Thursdays. I debated whether or not to cancel, since I had proclaimed it to be a stay-in-bed day, but then I decided the fresh air and sunshine would do us good. It was so lovely to walk and chat, and Brennan slept in the Moby wrap almost the entire 45 minute walk around the neighborhood.
Thirdly, Brennan is actually SLEEPING in his bassinet. This does not happen often during the daytime. Honestly, it's probably more because I haven't had the discipline to put him down for naps intentionally, but he's passed out. This means that I actually got to eat a hot lunch and that I'm getting to blog in the middle of the day.
Finally, friends of ours who use Fuzzibunz diapers successfully and are expecting another baby have agreed to purchase those 6 diapers from us. And another friend has offered to let us try her Bummis, since she is "done" having kids. Another friend actually offered to buy us new diapers to replace the Fuzzibunz. I am so thankful for all these people.
I'm also thankful to know that I have friends who encourage me when I'm struggling. There's just nothing I can say to express how much I need my network of friends and what it means to me when I get that email or phone call, especially because I know how busy their lives are, too. It's also a reminder to me to reciprocate and to be there for people, because people are more important than circumstances.
As for our next living situation and the Texas thing, most days, I KNOW God will provide. I just need to keep that in perspective when everything else is overwhelming me.
With the few moments I have remaining to myself, I'm going to read and doze on the couch in our study.
It actually feels kind of weird to be sitting here by myself with the laptop actually on my lap and no baby breastfeeding.
Oh, how my life has changed.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
The fog and feelings of being completely lost will lift, I promise. Give it a couple of years and you'll be a pro Mom. It really can be overwhelming, even when it's kid 2 or 3. Just slog through the best you can, that's all you can do, and pray! I'm sure you're doing a great job. Try not to sweat the small stuff. I think children are given to us to help us take a giant chill pill. I certainly have had to - more and more the older they get! Anyway, glad you had a good restorative day! :) Megan
ReplyDeleteYou're an awesome mom, Hannah....and if $117 is the largest amount you ever "lose" because of a misjudgment, well, it'll be a true miracle!
ReplyDeleteWhat happened to Texas? Still planning on going, just later? God's timings are weird/frustrating sometimes.